Socks
I watched
as my son, Elijah, balanced himself on my mom’s lap with the wobbly legs of a
novice walker. He seemed so enthralled with the picture hanging behind
her. I can hardly remember a time when
Elijah did not talk. That may have something to do with the fact that I talked
to him from the first moment that I was aware of his existence. Full on
conversations without the baby talk. Although he kept looking at the above
picture and saying “socks!”. I wasn’t
understanding how he was seeing socks. I studied the picture for a long time
and finally the image of socks emerged.
The shadows cast by the lodge poles in the old adobe house were indeed creating
socks. He wasn’t confused or getting anything wrong, he was seeing socks!
My son
Elijah is now 24, creative, hilarious and a neurodivergent individual. I have spent many years reminding myself to
look for the socks; to try to see things from his perspective. Always trying to
remind educators that he may not be a typical kiddo, but there’s so much beauty
in that. To please begin with positive attributes in every IEP meeting,
especially when he was in attendance. To the doctor who wanted to medicate him
at two, but not diagnose him, a hard NO. I am thrilled that Elijah challenges
the way we look at some things. To the person who told me early on that I
needed to break his spirit, thank goodness that I didn’t take that advice. When
he was younger and I was his advocate (that never fully ends, by the way), I
tried to remind everyone that Elijah is full of possibilities and abilities,
not disabilities. To help them see that
neurodiversity is not a negative, but only another difference like any other. Elijah
and I have discussed that it is completely up to him whether he chooses to
disclose these traits or keep them to himself.
I’ve tried to raise Elijah to be a strong self-advocate and to be proud
of who he is, and I feel he is largely successful in that. He’s now an
open-minded, capable, polite, thoughtful, insightful young man that happens to
be on the autism spectrum.
